What exactly is a Caring Cradle or Cuddle Cot?
Our Communications Director, Catie Macdonald answers that question with grace-
I've gotten the question a lot: "what is a Caring Cradle and why is it needed?" Although I'd like to spare you from the ugliest parts of infant loss, the answer to this question is rooted deeply in the saddest and darkest part. A part that you don't think about or realize before it happens to you, but that if you DID think about, you would have such a deeper understanding that would allow you to better provide support and compassion to those in your life who HAVE been touched by infant and pregnancy loss. In this post I will outline the reason these are needed; it is one painful to think about and process, but if you can accept and understand, you can truly know the value in these cradles.
Unfortunately, medically you often only get a few hours with your baby after they pass away. Maybe it's their fragile, tiny bodies, often premature, maybe it's because they have been in water in utero, maybe it's because sometimes the baby passed away days before he or she was born, or maybe from the distress of labor and delivery. I'm not sure the science behind it, but your sweet baby's body starts visibly showing signs of decomposition much quicker than an adult body. That's the ugly truth. As a parent, it is infinitely hard to see those changes taking place. Although a hospital does not limit how much time you spend with your baby after their death, most parents choose to say goodbye as soon as these changes start taking place because they cannot bare to see them. This is usually, again, within a few hours.
In the event of a stillbirth, those hours are often fraught with labor and delivery complications and medication side effects. I'll share something deeply personal with you: they gave me pain medication during my labor which worked great. For the after-birth pains, they gave me a different medication that did not settle with me at all. I was literally throwing up and seeing double the entire few hours I got with my sweet Olivia. That fact will literally haunt me for my entire life.
A Caring Cradle is a bassinet that keeps the baby cold, and can delay these changes from happening all while letting the parents keep their baby in-room with them. They can keep the baby in-room with them for as long as they would like, up to three days even, allowing them to grieve and say goodbye on their own time. Hospitals can currently take baby away to the morgue and return him or her for a later viewing, but having baby removed multiple times is extremely distressing for the mother. Most choose to say goodbye just once, instead. It also adds a layer of dignity to the baby's death; the cradles look just like a regular bassinet, as you can see from this picture. It is much more calming to see your baby in a bassinet rather than wondering what clinical medical container your child has been placed in.
Although I will admit, the thought of this seems a bit strange or morbid if you have never been there. But the reality is that spending time with your deceased to grieve with dignity is not weird or strange at all. It's perfectly normal and acceptable to have an open casket or a viewing at a funeral home for family members after a loved one has passed away. With a baby, that is often not possible. These Caring Cradles give parents that time right away. It provides time for out-of-town family to arrive to visit the baby as well, providing closure and assisting in the grieving process for the entire family. It also provides the hospital more opportunity to create memory keepsakes such as 3d molds of the baby's feet, hand imprints, professional photographs, etc. I can tell you by experience that any tangible keepsake you have of your baby is something you cling to and something that helps immensely with processing your grief.
THIS is why it is important. Creating memories where there are none. Giving families the gift of time. Time they will never get back after it is gone. If you've read this far, you clearly have a heart for the pain these families suffer with. Would you consider giving? These Caring Cradles will make a huge difference. Each Caring Cradle costs around $5000. The Jaxon Kade Foundation's mission is to place a Caring Cradle in every Oklahoma hospital who wants one and would use one. You can help us accomplish that mission.
Our Communications Director, Catie Macdonald answers that question with grace-
I've gotten the question a lot: "what is a Caring Cradle and why is it needed?" Although I'd like to spare you from the ugliest parts of infant loss, the answer to this question is rooted deeply in the saddest and darkest part. A part that you don't think about or realize before it happens to you, but that if you DID think about, you would have such a deeper understanding that would allow you to better provide support and compassion to those in your life who HAVE been touched by infant and pregnancy loss. In this post I will outline the reason these are needed; it is one painful to think about and process, but if you can accept and understand, you can truly know the value in these cradles.
Unfortunately, medically you often only get a few hours with your baby after they pass away. Maybe it's their fragile, tiny bodies, often premature, maybe it's because they have been in water in utero, maybe it's because sometimes the baby passed away days before he or she was born, or maybe from the distress of labor and delivery. I'm not sure the science behind it, but your sweet baby's body starts visibly showing signs of decomposition much quicker than an adult body. That's the ugly truth. As a parent, it is infinitely hard to see those changes taking place. Although a hospital does not limit how much time you spend with your baby after their death, most parents choose to say goodbye as soon as these changes start taking place because they cannot bare to see them. This is usually, again, within a few hours.
In the event of a stillbirth, those hours are often fraught with labor and delivery complications and medication side effects. I'll share something deeply personal with you: they gave me pain medication during my labor which worked great. For the after-birth pains, they gave me a different medication that did not settle with me at all. I was literally throwing up and seeing double the entire few hours I got with my sweet Olivia. That fact will literally haunt me for my entire life.
A Caring Cradle is a bassinet that keeps the baby cold, and can delay these changes from happening all while letting the parents keep their baby in-room with them. They can keep the baby in-room with them for as long as they would like, up to three days even, allowing them to grieve and say goodbye on their own time. Hospitals can currently take baby away to the morgue and return him or her for a later viewing, but having baby removed multiple times is extremely distressing for the mother. Most choose to say goodbye just once, instead. It also adds a layer of dignity to the baby's death; the cradles look just like a regular bassinet, as you can see from this picture. It is much more calming to see your baby in a bassinet rather than wondering what clinical medical container your child has been placed in.
Although I will admit, the thought of this seems a bit strange or morbid if you have never been there. But the reality is that spending time with your deceased to grieve with dignity is not weird or strange at all. It's perfectly normal and acceptable to have an open casket or a viewing at a funeral home for family members after a loved one has passed away. With a baby, that is often not possible. These Caring Cradles give parents that time right away. It provides time for out-of-town family to arrive to visit the baby as well, providing closure and assisting in the grieving process for the entire family. It also provides the hospital more opportunity to create memory keepsakes such as 3d molds of the baby's feet, hand imprints, professional photographs, etc. I can tell you by experience that any tangible keepsake you have of your baby is something you cling to and something that helps immensely with processing your grief.
THIS is why it is important. Creating memories where there are none. Giving families the gift of time. Time they will never get back after it is gone. If you've read this far, you clearly have a heart for the pain these families suffer with. Would you consider giving? These Caring Cradles will make a huge difference. Each Caring Cradle costs around $5000. The Jaxon Kade Foundation's mission is to place a Caring Cradle in every Oklahoma hospital who wants one and would use one. You can help us accomplish that mission.
We are grateful to have two options to donate for our families in crisis, please visit their websites for more information about their devices and company
https://caringcradle.com/
http://flexmort.com/cuddle-cots/
https://caringcradle.com/
http://flexmort.com/cuddle-cots/
Because of our donors we have been able to provide the following hospitals with a cooling unit:
OKLAHOMA CITY METRO AREA
St. Anthony Hospital
1000 N Lee Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK
In memory of Solomon James Davis April 3, 2013 Cuddle Cot
Lakeside Women's Hospital
11200 N Portland Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK
In memory of Jaxon Kade Martin June 19, 2014 Cuddle Cot
Mercy Hospital
4300 W Memorial Rd.
Oklahoma City, OK
In memory of Baby Brown Cuddle Cot
Southwest Medical Center
4401 S Western Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK
In memory of Richard Colbert Beams Aug 29, 2013
Integris Health Edmond
4801 Integris Parkway
Edmond, OK
In memory of Connor Ryan Dewbre July 12, 2017
Integris Canadian Valley Hospital
1201 Health Center Pkwy
Yukon, OK
In memory of Emmarie Rose Moore February 17, 2018
OU Children’s Hospital
1200 Children's Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK
In memory of Katie Marie Phelps Jan 02, 1999
REGIONAL HOSPITALS
Integris Bass Baptist
600 S Monroe St.
Enid, OK
In memory of:
Maddox Blake Manuel February 1, 2017
Maelee Ann Manuel October 28, 2014
Stillwater Medical Center
1323 W 6th Ave.
Stillwater, OK
In memory of Olivia MacDonald July 1, 2018
TULSA METRO AREA
St. John's Medical Center
1924 Utica Ave.
Tulsa, OK
In memory of Olivia MacDonald July 1, 2018.
Hillcrest Main Hospital
1120 S Utica Ave.
Tulsa, OK
In memory of Olivia MacDonald July 1, 2018.
Hillcrest South Hospital
8801 S 101st E Ave.
Tulsa, OK
In memory of Kadence Jade Hass September 3, 2010.
St. Francis Main Hospital
6161 S. Yale Ave.
Tulsa, OK
In memory of Sean Himes July 18, 1997-October 3rd, 1997.
OKLAHOMA CITY METRO AREA
St. Anthony Hospital
1000 N Lee Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK
In memory of Solomon James Davis April 3, 2013 Cuddle Cot
Lakeside Women's Hospital
11200 N Portland Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK
In memory of Jaxon Kade Martin June 19, 2014 Cuddle Cot
Mercy Hospital
4300 W Memorial Rd.
Oklahoma City, OK
In memory of Baby Brown Cuddle Cot
Southwest Medical Center
4401 S Western Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK
In memory of Richard Colbert Beams Aug 29, 2013
Integris Health Edmond
4801 Integris Parkway
Edmond, OK
In memory of Connor Ryan Dewbre July 12, 2017
Integris Canadian Valley Hospital
1201 Health Center Pkwy
Yukon, OK
In memory of Emmarie Rose Moore February 17, 2018
OU Children’s Hospital
1200 Children's Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK
In memory of Katie Marie Phelps Jan 02, 1999
REGIONAL HOSPITALS
Integris Bass Baptist
600 S Monroe St.
Enid, OK
In memory of:
Maddox Blake Manuel February 1, 2017
Maelee Ann Manuel October 28, 2014
Stillwater Medical Center
1323 W 6th Ave.
Stillwater, OK
In memory of Olivia MacDonald July 1, 2018
TULSA METRO AREA
St. John's Medical Center
1924 Utica Ave.
Tulsa, OK
In memory of Olivia MacDonald July 1, 2018.
Hillcrest Main Hospital
1120 S Utica Ave.
Tulsa, OK
In memory of Olivia MacDonald July 1, 2018.
Hillcrest South Hospital
8801 S 101st E Ave.
Tulsa, OK
In memory of Kadence Jade Hass September 3, 2010.
St. Francis Main Hospital
6161 S. Yale Ave.
Tulsa, OK
In memory of Sean Himes July 18, 1997-October 3rd, 1997.
